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Posted in Award, Blog, Entertainment, Humour, Inspiration

Very Inspiring Blogger Award

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Wow! So thanks to dianarasmussen for nominating me for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award! Diana is an extremely inspiring blogger, and if you haven’t read any of her stuff yet I highly recommend you do so. She is someone who isn’t afraid to express her beliefs, and reach out to those who need it. I’m highly honoured to have been nominated by her!

There are some rules for this award – which remind me that we are paying it forward in our acknowledgement of those who inspire us.  Here are the rules:

1. Display the award logo on your blog.

2. Link back to the person who nominated you.

3. State 7 things about yourself.

4. Nominate 15 bloggers for this award.

5. Notify those bloggers of the nomination by linking to one of their specific posts so that they get notified by ping back.

So 7 things about myself. 

1. As of today, I have managed to lose just under 20 pounds/ 1st 6lbs/ something kgs… following the Weightwatchers diet. I say following in the loosest way possible…I still eat like the worlds about to end and I’ve only just started exercising this week.

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2. I  was born prematurely by 2 months. I was so small that most of my relatives were afraid to touch me/refused to touch me. But I ate like a beast so in no time at all I was bigger than most kids.

3.I’m originally from Zimbabwe, but moved to England when I was 8 (back when no one had even heard of the place) due to the old mother getting promoted and getting a job here. Now I have an English accent that occasionally pronounces things in an American way… But I don’t think that’s due to spending the first 8 years of my life in Zimbabwe.. I think it’s due to me watching too many American sitcoms..

4.I went to a private school while I was in Zimbabwe and we had a summer aswell as a winter uniform. The summer uniform was a lovely light blue dress with a checkered dark and light blue collar. The winter uniform was a light blue shirt and royal blue trousers.  My mum, being like most mums, liked to buy things that were too big in the hopes that they would last that little bit longer as I grew into them.Sometimes I even worried that I’d drown in my own clothing because they were that big! So naturally I shouldn’t have been as shocked as I was when  one cold winters day, while lining up to go to assembly, my trousers decided that that would be a good time to fall down. Something that was just bound to happen.The memory still haunts me.

5. Following the fact that my mum liked buying me oversized clothes; One of my teachers back in Zimbabwe  noticed my sports uniform was waaayy too big during a uniform check. She asked me “Why don’t you get your mum to sew it for you?” I simply said “My mums gone.” This then resulted in an extremely awkward silence.  What I hadn’t followed up with, and probably should have, was that my mum was gone as in gone to England. She’d been in the UK for 2 years before the rest of the family came across. My teacher had asked this question during that awkward 2 year period.

6. I use to pretend to be vegetarian at school because I was convinced they use to get better food than everybody else.I kept it up for a surprisingly long time.

7. The June that’s just gone, I had an interview for an apprentiship/year long training job at Channel 4 in London. I came second…Well I say second, but it was more like joint second. It was an assessment day where it started off with 11 of us who’d been selected and there were 2 knockout stages. In the morning we had to do an individual presentation, then after that we had to do a group task. We then had lunch which, if you’ve ever watched the apprentice, felt a lot like like how I imagine the candidates must feel when they’re sat in that dark gloomy cafe just before one of them is fired. After lunch, we had the first knockout stage where they’d call your names out in groups and take you out of the room. Luckily for me, and 2 others, they took us downstairs and told us we were going through to the next round.The rest of the people were told to leave… We didn’t even get to say bye… The final stage consisted of a panel interview (you against 3 interviewers) and a bunch of tests..

So yeah that’s my 7 facts! Thank you for reading them! And here are my 15  bloggers! It was hard choosing just 15!

15 VERY INSPIRING BLOGGERS:

1.Errinspelling

2.Yahobahne

3.makagutu

4.Ink Pastries

5. The Friendship Tree

6.The War In My Brain

7.Ihaveanopinionidliketoshare

8.Shadows Of Love

9.Terry Marotta

10.A Solo Singer In America

11.Peaceful Warriors

12.Phenomenalmama

13.Carries Cultural Commentary

14.Journey to a Healthier Me

15.The Idea Bucket

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Posted in Blog, Entertainment, Family, Humour, Lifestyle, Personal

The Toilet Comes With A Hole For A Reason

Dear Brother,

I think it’s time you learnt that man made hole in toilet for a reason. As a loving sister, I thought I’d give you a hand seeing as you’re having such a hard time solving the mystery. It’s been a struggle, I know.

Firstly. It’s not for you to put your keys in after a drunken night, neither is it a place to keep your wallet and new phone.

It’s not a space for you to put your pillow, and rest your head, after one of your usual nights.Where you came up with that one? We’ll never really know.

I do regret to inform you that no matter how hard you try, or how strongly you believe, it will never respond to your woes. Regardless of how much you say to the contraption.Believe me, many have tried. They’re just rude that way, and it’s just something we’ve had to accept. A bit like science. Unless you know something we don’t?

In your intoxicated state, it does however make me smile to see how interesting you find the water in it’s usual motions.So much so that I’m contemplating capturing it on film so the whole world can share in my joy.

Before I go, there’s just one thing I do ask – beg for even. Even if this is the only thing you take away from this letter.

Aim. For. The. Hole. Before. You. Go.

But I like to see that you’re trying. Maybe in another 23 years you’ll finally get it right!

Hopefully after this we’ll be talking about the mystery’s of the toilet seat. It doesn’t only just lift up! But that’s a story for another day. I know how much this is to take in for you. We can take things one step at a time.

Signed,

Your loving sister who, amoungst other things, is sick of falling in and fishing your keys out of the toilet.

Posted in Blog, Humour, Inspiration, Personal

A Re-introduction

Wow..3 years ago. 3 years ago. Three. Years. Ago!  That was the last time I posted on here.

I could blame it on life, on being busy. But honestly, I could have found the time if I tried harder.

It’s funny. Because of the way in which time gets away from us,  you don’t even realise at that moment where you select ‘publish post’  that it may be the last post you ever submit..Or atleast in my case, you publish for the next 3 years.

I’m sorry for that very confusing sentence. It’s late and as you can tell,  I’m out of practice.

But I’m back.

Hello to old friends, welcome to the new. I hope you are doing well and everything is good with you.

What have I been up to in the last 3 years?

Where do I start..

I’ve been stuck in a new city. Chained down by a job, responsibilities and bills. All those evils my mother warned me about but encouraged me to pursue.

I graduated from University – barely scraping by thanks to my love of procrastinating.

I live in a new flat, miles away from the place I call home. Surrounded by very …interesting characters, to say the least.

But overall, me as a person? I have not changed much. I’m still the same, only with a higher number added next to my age.

Am I wiser from the things I’ve seen and experienced in the last 3 years? Maybe so. Maybe not.  All I know is that I’m glad to have found this place again, where I can let out my inner thoughts and share them with those who want to listen.

Posted in Blog, Entertainment, Food, Friends, Humour, Lifestyle, Personal, Photography, Student, Summer

Hellos From The Baking Addict

It’s been a while since I last did a post.. I’ve completely forgotten how to string a sentence together, let alone write a whole post..Let’s just pray this goes okay! Don’t worry I promise to keep it short!

First of all I just wanted to say that I hope you’re all having a fantastic new year! I know it’s over half way through 2014.. but better late than ever right?

So far I’ve had a hell of a year. I finished my second year at university in June.( Somehow I managed to pass with my sanity intact which was a shock, but I’m not one to look a gift horse in the face..) Now it’s only one more year to go before I’m freeee. I’m also nearly free from that awful house which I mentioned in my last post! In September I’ll be living in what can only be described as one of the nicest houses I’ve ever seen, with people I barely even know!

It’s weird how at university it’s okay to live with complete strangers..The people I’ll be living with though seem nice enough, so hopefully it goes well. We all bonded due to our past mistakes with bad housemates. This time around, I have to say, I’m kind of more willing to live with people I hate because the place is out of this world!  It even has a jacuzzi bath! I’ve probably jinxed myself now, and I wrote the word year a bit too many times..now it doesn’t even look like a real word…

As for right now, I’m currently working at a bookshop in order to earn some dough before I go back to university.I spent pretty much the whole of last year hovering dangerously close to the poverty line due to too many takeaways at the beginning of each term..I can’t give up the takeaways, so my only other option was to get a job..Let’s just say working there is not exactly what I imagined it would be like…I’d rather be spending my summer eating dirt to be honest, but I guess beggars can’t be choosers.

Saving isn’t going too great though due to my current addiction. Buying supplies is not cheap regardless of what the supermarket try and tell you.I literally wake up every morning wanting to bake something. It’s getting very worrying indeed, especially for my dad who has to pay the electricity bills. My waist line isn’t too happy about this current predicament either. Today I ended up making chocolate chip cookies as well as 2 coloured cupcakes – some strawberry flavour while some are a plain vanilla. Normally everything I bake just kind of collapses into something even satan wouldn’t eat, but today it actually went okay! For the cookies I ish followed a recipe (i’ll post it up if I can find where I actually got it from. 🙂 ) and they taste edible.. which is a giant step up from the things I usually make.

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Anyway I hope you’re good! Thank you very much for reading, it means a lot!

Posted in Blog, Friends, Humour, Lifestyle, Personal, Relationship, Student

Some People Ruin It For Everyone

“Some people just ruin it for everyone.” That’s a phrase that I’ve been hearing a lot lately, and the truth of this phrase really hit me hard over the last year and a half.

Something that I could never really get to grips with is how some people can hurt you so much. Say the meanest things to you – things that you remember for a lifetime. Things that keep you up at bed all night while their sound alseep.. They enjoy the rest of their life while you’re left stained. I don’t understand how some people can behave the way they behave and not see a problem with it? I don’t understand how some people can just be so selfish. I just don’t understand some people.

Sometimes it feels like I’m paying to go through hell because of ‘some people’ that I currently have the misfortune of living with. If “my university years are the best years of my life’ I’m scared to see what else life has in store for me.

As I type this I feel like one of those angsty teens in those teenage rom com movies, except its more like I’m in some kind of horror film.

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Okay so I’ve decided to write a blog post about this because it’s gotten to that point where I don’t really know what to do anymore, and writing things out just generally tends to help me through things. I’ve cried about it. I’ve attempted to talk to others about it, although it gets to a stage where you feel like you’re just bothering everyone. And I’m lost. If it wasn’t for one of my other housemates feeling the same way, I would have probably lost my sanity by now.

So I’m in my second year of university at the moment, currently living in a shared house with 4 boys and 2 other girls.

Shared being the key word. Sharing requires a compromise, respecting other people that you live with. If it was one of their own one bedroom flat, then maybe I’d understand some of their behavior.

I can not even begin to tell you how much of a bad decision living with these people was. “You’re going to regret it my mum said.” I knew she was right because, lets face it, the woman is always right.

I already had my doubts seeing as I practically hated one of the boys to begin with. That sounds really harsh I know, but it’s justified..Well in my mind it’s justified. I don’t hate anyone, that is literally something that I don’t do. I like to see the good in people. But I guess some people just aren’t meant to get along.

From the moment I met him. That sounds weirdly romantic.. “from the moment I met him, I knew he was the one for me..” No. That’s definitely not what happened. He is the incarnation of all that is wrong with the world. Manipulative, degrading, liar. Those are just some of the words that come to mind. As they say “his ass must be jealous of some of the crap that comes out of his mouth.”

On a more serious note, from the first  day I met him, he pointed out all my insecurities. Just before university, I went through a time where I would hide my body by wearing oversize clothing. In the first week, he called me out on it, “Why are you always wearing those? Are those the only things you own?” Always commenting on every little habit that I had adopted from years of insecurities. At that time, everything was heightened due to the fact that I was in a new environment, where I didn’t know anyone. Meeting someone like that was something my senses just couldn’t handle. Fair to say, he made my first semester hell. And he knew it. What was worse was that everyone thought he was a ‘nice person’ ‘ he’s lovely’ ‘he’s so thoughtful’ .. I felt like maybe I was wrong about him but he just carried on taking advantage of everyone, but other people couldn’t really see it.

They say 60% of communication is things we don’t say with our mouths but with our bodies. His body was telling a whole different story to his “I do respect you guys.” As someone who studies body language and the general behaviors of people as part of my studies, I began picking up patterns in his behavior that made me think, he’s really doesn’t give sh*t about other people. OPEN YOUR EYES PEOPLE.Or maybe that was just me thinking that I was picking up things when really I was just clouded by my sheer dislike for him.

However, other people started to pick on the things he did.

He is the kind of guy who will pick on the quiet girl in class and throw things in her hair knowing she won’t do anything about it because she’s quiet.

In fact he did do that to someone.

He is the kind of guy who will sleep with 5 girls at the same time behind their backs and see it as an achievement and not as a problem.

In fact he did do that!

He is the kind of guy who will pretend to be one person when he’s with his housemates, but when his friends come over he will step on you, make fun of you and ridicule you and not take any responsibility for his actions and instead blame you when you get angry.

That one happens on a regular basis.

What I’ve learnt is if you’re not going to help him climb up the social ladder because you ‘lack’ social status then you get what I call the act.

Where he acts like he will stop smoking in the house because you have difficulty breathing. But he carries on and so you have to pay the price by clutching your pillow every night hoping that the smoke that’s diffused it’s way into your room through the paper thin walls, will fade away as it eases into your system. And even though you have to visit the doctors yet again simply due to these people, he will lie about doing it , despite the fact that the smell of smoke is everywhere.

He will act like he will stop playing his music too loudly. He act like he will stop eating your food. He act like he will stop throwing your food out the window. He act like he will replace the chairs he broke with his friends which cost a fortune and now you all have to replace despite not having sat on them once. He will act like he will treat you like a human being.

With him it’s always “that was so and so’s fault.” “I was really drunk.” ” I can’t even apologise cause I don’t remember” He will harrass people. He has basically put me through a hell that I cant even describe. I wish I could write down everything he’s done, but I’m scared that I won’t be able to do justice to it.  I just can’t explain the way he talks to people. The way he is really manipulative. Just everything. It makes me sick. One of the other girls I live with had to go home for a couple of days, home for her being the other side of the country, just because she’d had enough.

Yet the funny thing is. He believes he is a nice person.

I’m no judge, but nice people wouldn’t take advantage of other people knowing full well what they’re doing. Nice people wouldn’t attempt to make life just generally worse than it already is for other people.Nice people are nice.

The boys in general are just some of the worst people I’ve ever had the misfortune of encountering. It’s like old macdonald, I think you’re missing some of your animals and they appear to think they’re humans. It’s gotten to a point where I don’t even want to think about getting married! But don’t worry, I know not everyone is like this.

The whole dynamics of the house is awful. And it’s at the hardest of moments where you learn who your true friends are. Or in my case, who your true friends aren’t.

At the moment, it’s just me and another one of the girls fighting a losing battle and paying ridiculous amounts of fines simply because of some people. The other girl, the nice one who gets along with everyone may be more two sided than we first thought. I’m sick of some people.

Sorry for this overly ranty post. But I needed to get it out of my system. Thank you for taking the time to read this!

Posted in Award, Blog, Entertainment, Humour, Inspiration, Lifestyle, Music, Personal, Religion, Social Media, Student, Video, Youtube

My 1/4 life crises

Today I realised a scary thought, in less than a year I will be 20. 8 months from today actually! Where on earth has the time gone?

I think I may genuinely be having a 1/4 life crises. A couple of weeks ago at the cinema when I was asked what my age was, I genuinely replied with the answer 14…It’s been a long time since I was last 14..It’s like I can remember the day that Michael jackson died as if it was yesterday (not the best example I know) and how has it already been a year and a bit since Whitney died!? Where is the time going seriously?

When I look back, I really question myself. What have I actually done with my life? What have I got to show for the 20 years that I’ve been alive? A few (alot of) extra pounds of fat maybe from all the laziness and over consumption of the devils food. Why does he make it so tempting?

Where am I going? What am I doing with my life? What aims do I have in life?

I have no special talent, I don’t stand out in anyway, I can’t even think of what I really want to achieve. I have no direction (something my mother constantly reminds me of) I’m half living at home, half not while I’m at uni. While a large majority of ex class mates are married with children…one of them is on her 3rd child. YES 3rd! Even my mum stopped at 2.

Okay maybe I don’t want to go that far with my life at the moment.

But although I am young, these questions are increasingly becoming more important as the time goes on.

Last saturday I went to a friends baptism. She wasn’t the only one getting baptised, there were 10 people including her. Every single one of these 10 people had an amazing story to share. And everywhere I look there are people who have done amazing things.People younger than me, people older than me, people the same age as me.

It’s scary when you speak to someone whose younger than you who knows exactly what they want in life when you don’t.

The other day I had a genuine moment where everything just caught up with me. I was listening to a really happy song, you know “Still into you” by Paramore..(They’ve really gone down hill.) and then I suddenly just started crying. Not just you know a few tears, it was like an actual flood. I still had the music playing from my iPhone, this was when I started questioning my musical choices because the next song that came on was called Alone, and the one after that was talking about God knows what other depressing topic. But yeah it didn’t help much.

My little big cry helped a lot actually, and writing this post helped a lot too actually.

I know I’m just stressing over something that doesn’t really need to be stressed over just yet. I’m just an over emotional woman, damn you hormones!

I’ve also recently started Vlogging incase anyone happens to be interested in youtube, and people talking to a camera.. My channel name is addieshutup (suprise suprise) The youtube community is actually quite fun to be part of and if I can make one person smile that  would make my day!

Thank you very much for reading this as always!

Posted in Blog, Family, Food, Friends, Lifestyle, Personal, Photography, Student

Birthday Week.. Because One Day Isn’t Long Enough

So last saturday was my birthday  day as I’d already mentioned! One great thing about having friends from uni, friends from back home, as well as family, is that I managed to stretch this out into a birthday week! Every activity was of course food related.. After a crummy week the week before, I’d promised myself I would pick myself right up, and I managed!

The day with my friends from back home was so and so. It’s weird how sometimes when you’re  reunited with the people who you knew for so long, people you use to spend every day with, somehow you can’t quite go back to that old routine. Something just doesn’t feel right. But it was still a pretty good day. We went to a buffet and a 10 second boat ride… Yes we thought it would be longer…Imagine our disappointment..

On my actual birthday day, my housemates (my family away from home) literally made me feel like the luckiest girl in the world! At midnight on the dot, I was being showered with Happy Birthdays in my tiny room. During the day, they took me out for a day trip, aswell as paid for my meal and surprised me with a birthday cake! The festivities carried on into the next day. However I had to undertake something that had sounded like a good idea the day before, but turned out to be….not such a great idea. A 19 pancake challenge. This is the act of eating 19 pancakes in less than an hour. I don’t know if I should be proud, or ashamed… But I did it in 50 something minutes… The last 4 took on average 7 minutes each to eat… There was wreching; there were tears, but I made it through!

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Carrying on… We once again had another pancake breakfast yesterday.. This is where we had American pancakes (made by me) vs  English pancakes.

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I then came home this weekend and my family really  finished off the week on a good note! A good Birthday week!

And I also got some pretty cool presents!  Every year since I was 15, I’ve made sure to buy myself a present to avoid disapointment.. It’s become a weird tradition which I highly recommend.. This year I bought a cheap lense and even cheaper lighting for my more expensive camera.. The end product? Another picture to add to the vanity collection. Hoorah self potraights.

Posted in Blog, Entertainment, Filming, Food, Humour, Inspiration, Lifestyle, Personal, Religion

When life gives you lemons, how do you make lemonade?

I’m a firm believer in God, and that’s something that I never try and hide. I try and look at the bright side of any situation because everything bad that happens in life must have a reason behind it.. Right..?. But sometimes I do find myself thinking,  “God…? If you’re listening.. Please inform me of the exact time and date of when I shot that small puppy or punched that newborn because, I must have done one of the two… or both, to deserve this!”

I’m not going to go too in depth into what actually happened, because as they say “theres no point crying over spilt milk.” But I will give a brief rendition of what happened because.. I’ve never really truly  stuck to that saying.

Starting a blog has been something I’ve really enjoyed. Getting to be part of a great blogging community. Meeting some of my favourite bands. Getting to interview them.  Talk to them. etc.  As many of you know as you’re probably do this yourselves, I don’t get anything out of this besides the rare guest list and sometimes requests to do others interviews. I do all of this because I genuinely love it. I like to think that even if the opportunity ever arose to make money out of it (which i doubt), I wouldn’t take it because mixing money and a passion sometimes leads to things becoming corrupt, and I don’t want that to happen. Or even worse, you’ll find yourself hating that thing you loved because now you are being financially forced to do it!

However. As always; with anything that appears to be going well, theres always the bad that comes creeping along at some point. And that bad is pretty bad. You think it’s a myth,”it won’t happen to me,” but oh dear god it will. And when it happens, its way worse than what your imagination could even begin to conjure up.

Unlike with something you don’t care about doing; when you truly love something you do, when it goes wrong it’s something that is emotionally draining as hell. It feels like how I imagine it would be like giving birth from your heart. It’s unimaginable. A crippling experience that you carry with you for as long as your cognitive processes are functioning.

You get spit on.

Chewed up.

Tested to a level you never even thought imaginable.

And because you love it, it hurts twice over.

Along the way, you  meet some of the biggest egos you will ever encounter. Hypocrites. Demons disguised as humans. In this world, how can people who preach about standing up for yourself, reaching out for what you believe in, not letting anyone ridicule you; people who know what it’s like to be ridiculed – turn around and do that to the people who believe in them? It’s just something that I will never understand. Strangely though; I’m glad I had the chance to encounter this first hand. Through some unknown power, during that moment, I was able to stick it out. I may have been crying on the inside, slowly counting to ten and thinking about the maximum sentence for murder..But strangely after that I felt like a stronger person. You know why? I released something. Something simple that just hit me in the face.

They. Don’t. Care.

They. Really. Don’t. Care.

About you.

What you’ve worked for.

They. Don’t. Care.

So why am I giving them the satisfaction of tearing me down?

It took finding myself wondering around in the rain without a way home, with a broken camera that had cost me a fortune, shoes that were soaked to the brim  and the consumption of 5 packs of brownies (20 in a pack) to realise and accept this.

Who are they to take away something that I’ve built? Something that I’ve spent time on? Something that has taken me months to develop from an idea into reality? At the end of the day, maybe I should feel sorry for them because they don’t practice what they preach? Their words lack weight and meaning. Who on earth are they to preach a word through lyric and verse that they don’t practise? How much do I have to hate myself to take ridicule from them?

It literally takes something so bad; Something so embarrassing; Something so horrible: To feel empowered.That moment where no one is on your side and you just want the world to swallow you up. It’s weird. I feel like my inner lion has been unleased or something strange and cheesy like that.

I’m not going to lie.  I did feel like “Why am I even bothering” and am in no way cured completely. But its a means to an end. You get a feeling like “I survived…? I freaking survived!?”  There will be more times when things get worse,worser and worsest, but at the end of that you’ll emerge a stronger person. You prove them right by giving up, and if you do give up then maybe they deserve to be right? You’re giving them permission to be right! The least you owe yourself is to carry on!

When life attempts to through you a lemon, remember it’s bad at sports. Instead of passing them gently, it really pummels you with them. Hard. In a place you won’t really expect. Next time, just remember to wear your armour. If you try and run away; even if you think you’ve gotten away, it will just come at you from a different angle. Simple.

On a side note. It’s my birthday next week. As you may be able to tell.. it’s been a really crummy week. We can only really go up from here… Hopefully.

Posted in Blog, Entertainment, Food, Humour, Inspiration, Interview, Music, Personal, Revision, Student, Video

Food and Interviews

Firstly, can I thank the Americans for creating fluffy pancakes.

Near enough everyday for the last few months at uni we’ve been having British pancakes for dinner. When me and my housemates like a particular food, we really drag it out until we get sick of it!  Last time it was chicken wraps, the time before that toffee waffles, the time before that normal waffles. We really like food.

Atleast when I leave uni, I can at least say I learnt something. Not actually what I’m there to do which is to gain some form of credible degree, but  instead how to make pancakes! Today I even took on the challenged of making American styled pancakes which were just ten times better. The British pancakes are thin and boring if you don’t put anything on them, where as the American ones are like little bundles of happiness. I see this being on on my morning menu for ..ever! They made me so happy that I had to write about them! I don’t quite get the adding maple syrup and butter part though?

A quick note In relation to my last post (procrastination can lead to great things) this is the final version of my first ever video interview! It’s really weird hearing your own voice back on recording. I sound different in my head…I sound.. better in my head….I laugh a lot less in my head anyway. (Every time I laugh, so does the person behind the camera which is why my laugh sounds so shocking.. At least that’s what I say to make myself feel better) And interviewing is actually extremely difficult! I didn’t realize just how nerve wrecking it would be! It felt even worse than being at a job interview because I was the one asking the questions! Anywho.. The second half is probably the better half of the interview. That’s the part where I actually know what I’m doing….

Hope you enjoy and thanks for reading as always!